Vandrea Does America: Days 200 - 208 (Wed 2/6/13 - Thu 2/14/13)- Mardi Gras in New Orleans

A brief history of Carnival: Often mistakenly referred to as Mardi Gras, the days leading up to Fat Tuesday are called Carnival, with the Monday before Lent being Luni Gras and Tuesday, Mardi Gras. Bead tossing began as a European Carnival tradition which New Orleans adopted around 1838 when masked men tossed bonbons, sugar-coated almonds and other confections to ladies along the parade route. The first Krewe to form was Rex in 1872 in honor of a Russian Grand Duke who was attending the festival. It was also this Krewe that established the official Mardi Gras colors purple (justice), green (faith) and gold (power).

Present day green represents the faith one has when drinking for hours, waiting for the parade and believing the liquid will not have to exit. Justice seems to be inviting thousands of people to drink for hours, making bathrooms scarce, and arresting them if they attempt to unburden themselves publicly. Faith is teenage boys on the floats trying to barter beads for breasts, them thinking their plastic is gold.

Out of all the Blogs we have written this is one of the hardest for sure. How do you go about describing the madness that is Carnival? Having survived 12 parades we can attest to both the good and the bad that is celebrating Mardi Gras.

Some tips for surviving Carnvial:

1. Don't get angry: Saving a spot at the frontlines after hours of waiting means nothing when it actually starts. (unless, like some locals, you block off 30 foot sections with ropes and nets and tents and ladders) People will push in front of you and children will get the majority of throws, partly because floats aim for them, but also because they are on the shoulders of their parents, and are, frankly, damn quick. This is just how it goes. Remember you are visitors, it's mostly just a bunch of plastic crap you don't need and that sometimes these same people end up making you have more fun (like the drunk lady who elbowed and pushed to get through the lines just to break into the tootsie roll).

2. Don't come early: As stated above saving a spot means little when push literally comes to shove. The only exception to this is on Fat Tuesday when people camp out overnight to get their spots. Though from what we observed and heard corroborated, some of the best parades happen before Mardi Gras. The elaborate and ridiculously equipped campsite cookouts can be more impressive than the floats on Tuesday.

3. Make sure and see Endymion: This year their parade was hosted by Kelly Clarkson. Enough said.

4. Do not get more than you can carry: You will get so much crap that you can't even find ways to get rid of it. It's best to make sure everyone around you gets their fair share. This will endear you to the crowd and also make you feel good.

Another good tip: don't have your boyfriend dressed like a creeper (Grizzly beard-check, plain green hat like the guy from the Ford Commercials-check, poncho-check, I looked like every kidnapper in every Lifetime movie ever made) and defintely don't have that suspicious boyfriend abandon a 30 lb bag of unwanted throws on a busy street corner, it might be mistaken for something dangerous. Add our pedo-van into the mix and I think security was keeping close tabs on us.

5. Drink, or don't, depending on your surroundings: This is a time of celebration and alcohol is a very real part of the atmosphere. Plenty of people in the parade were drunk. Drinking in public is legal in New Orleans but technically booze is supposed to be kept in a plastic container or covered with a paper bag. As a side note it is very illegal to pee in pubic (from what we've heard) so don't. This could get you into some trouble. Automatic jail time, not just a ticket. As mentioned earlier, plan ahead before consumption. We tried several spots, some of which were miles from any port-a-potties. On those days there was no drinking. We did find port-a-poties on Canal and Lee's Circle and a park in between. Once we found them, the little circle shaped park became our basecamp and we could be more carefree drinking wise.

6. Don't Flash: We didn't see anyone do it, there are tons of kids around and as far as we can tell you are doing something really wrong if you have to flash to get beads. This isn't to say that the majority of Throwers aren't a bunch of horny adolscent men wanting you to flash but they still give you stuff anyway.

After spending two weeks in New Orleans we have many stories, but in the interest of time and space I include just a selection of highlights:

To avoiding parking costs and traffic we took a bus in from Algiers each day and got to know the neighborhood which took some time to get used to considering that half of it was deserted (we aren't quite sure why it could be the buildings were condemned or hurricane related).This was a great way to see the real New Orleans and a much cheaper way to travel, although it gave us an earlier curfew than we would have liked.

When waiting for a bus one night we made quick friends with a girl who was so drunk she was standing in the middle of the road "directing traffic" which consisted of pointing for people to continue driving straight, just as they were doing before her interruption, a direction now difficult, she being in their way. After getting her safely back to the sidewalk she drunkly rambled on in an adorable accent about "not wanting people to get lost." Sometimes its hard to know if people are drunk around here. Sometimes they only sound that way. This girl was defintely drunk. She had directions for us too, worried we would get lost, instead of "going," and this is a loose transcription, "whmrng" what we really needed to do, she told us, was "go blrngwk" This was just the first of many times we ran into her, four times in total, making us think the town might be smaller than we had originally suspected. That or the girl is perpetually drunk and despite relying on the bus, impressively mobile. We saw her along the road in the alligator swamp and at another bus stop weighted down with multiple bags from the Hustler store. Interesting lady.

Filming the last episodes for the final season of the HBO show "Treme" (From the creator of the incomparable "The Wire," I know, I know, I'm always talking about this show) coincided with our stay and twice we happened upon the camera crew in action. The second time we actually got to stalk Steve Zahn.

After they completed filming his final scene for the show, he just started walking down the street. It just happened to be the same direction we were going. Naturally we followed him. He walked for blocks and blocks. No limo, no entourage. He said hi to several people without anyone recognizing him. It was pretty cool.

We got a delicious meal in the back of a tiny corner store, ate on somebody's stoop, found Nicholas Cage's old house and talked to his neighbor who confirmed that when the bank repossessed it Mr. Cage absconded with the chandliers. He later had to come back and return them.

We visited North America's oldest bar (where based on photographs Mr. Cage was a regular), walked all along the beautiful French District, Treme neighborhood and visited an enourmous and beautiful city park. We found the coolest Park Rangers (sorry Buzz Botts. You've been dethroned) who put on jazz concerts, explored the New Orleans history museum and an above ground historic cemeteries.

We felt we made the most of our time and got to see a little of how the average New Orlean lives. We heard an unimaginable amount of local music, feasted on local cuisine and generally fell in love with New Orleans.